Rates - Nightmare [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

This the only therapy I've really got the time for
Designing these rhymes, as i write in a psych ward
Sick of fucking skitzin out, Valium won't sit me down
Sick of feeling guilty, never ever meant to put you down
It wasn't me you see my personality is splitting up
Baby I'm not crazy I'm ashamed of all the shit I've done
And I ain't given up on life, watch me scribble up a rhyme
I try and fight it but I hide it all inside
See whats happened in my mind I'm in rehab cause of ice
And I'm feeling like I'm dreaming i don't need another high
Today I seen my mother cry I don't need another lie
My brother come to visit couldn't look him in the fuckin eyes
I had to struggle by I suffered from these nightmares
I never told you anything I'm knowing that you guys care
Sarah standing there and I'm happy that she never left
She knows I got potential but she's seeing that I'm just a mess
What a wreck
I need to get it off my chest
Took a pack of Panadeine four
Lucky that I cheated death
Wish that I could take it back
All that fucking crazy crap
Wish I never carried on
What I'm gonna say to dad
All I'd have to do is sit him down and he would start to listen
But I'm scared to tell him cause he's got a heart condition
This is far from whinging, right now I'm locked up
In a mental home, and they feeding me a lot of drugs
And this is hard to admit cause I'm faster
But my target is to be a better man no more startin shit
No more sparkin spliffs
No more fucking harder shit
No more being violent over comments like my father did
The violent episodes I'm having man I'm not that guy
Scott, Sarah, Troy, Dad, Mum, I apologise
And that is not a lie
Never did I compromise
Dad I see the mirror and its telling me I got your eyes
I really wanna try
Didn't really wanna die
Didn't wanna end it all, but the thought it crossed my mind
Safer if I'm locked inside, don't throw away the key
Give me a couple months and try it just to wait and see
Don't need to prove myself, Ratesy never lost a fight
How would you feel if I woke up and I lost my life
Hate it how I feel inside
Hate it how I'm really nice
Hate it how I turned into this person that can deal with life
Hate it how I dreamed about the shit that happened years ago
Hate it how your scared to talk to me you shouldn't fear me no
I know I carry on a lot
Smashing walls and them I drop
Another pill I'm gonna pop
Whens this ever gonna stop
Brother can you help me out
Never have you let me down
Never have you turned your back
Appreciate it let it out
This fucking gimmick has me spinning, tripping out
All these meds I've gotta take i really wanna spit em out
Sarah yeah I love you girl
Doing it for mum as well
All the drugs I've taken to escape it gonna fuck my health
Not with me with drugs it isn't helping man I need to talk
I see the blood I hear the screams its dreaming but I see it all
I wanna change my life I'm dangerous and crazy inside
Lately I hate it, contemplating should I take my life
People have it worse than me, I know it but it hurts to see
Me turn into this person thats so hurtful when i wake from dreams
I wake up in a cold sweat, Sarahs there to hold my hand
Told her things i didn't mean its tearing out my whole chest
I'm kinda scared cause your telling me I'm fucked up
Its fucking bullshit meet my family its just us
My dads sick its stressing me
These dreams get the best of me
They give me down and in an hour get my therapy
What to tell my fans would they ever understand
That I'm doing this and hiding out to be a better man
Did they ever really care
Yeah I've got my family there
And I'm lucky that I'm knowing that they'll be here till the end
I need to seek and find
Just a little peace of mind
You need to fill your fucking puzzle mother fucker have a piece of mine
Say that I'm intimidating
Charge me with intimidation
Drop the charges, motherfuckers getting help and sick of waiting
I wrote this track to speak my mind so say I'm not real
Place the blame on drug abuse and say its cause I pop pills
Say that I am faking it, you put up with these hot chills
Once you've gone and done that you tell me how you gonna feel
Another dream tonight
Speak to demons I need to find a happy medium and yeah I need to cry
I admit that I'm sitting here dripping tears
As I disappear another pipe to stay crystal clear
After this I can certainly say that I am tough
If your thinking otherwise you can go and get fucked!