Camboi Smif - Apologies [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

[VERSE 1: CAMBOI]
Hasta lavista
Cutting early outta class
The teacher caught me
And now she holding me back
I'm the last one on the bus
And no one saved me a seat
Except this pretty blonde girl said
"You can sit next to me"
I sat down, we had a chat
Made her smile, made her laugh
Flirting, twirling her hair
For an hour and a half
Got the digits, and a hug
Stepped my ass up off the bus
Felt euphoric like a drug
Aw fuck, I'm in love
I'm so in love
I can't control it
I'm so in love
And I don't want it
But this is love
It isn't a crush
And this love
Cuts, I gush
Blood and guts
I open up
She fucks me up
This fucking sucks
I'm bitching and wishing
I didn't speak up
Any bitches I'm kissing
Superfluous
Months go by
And I realize
The positive high
Just drops and dies
I drop to cry
Drops from my eyes
Materialize
And I decide
That behind
The pain and lies
You're worth the time
And that is why

[HOOK: ALSACIA]
Love
Is like a bad habit, baby
Love
Makes me feel like such a faggot
Moving on
Isn't something I can do
I've tried and tried
And every time
I fuck up
So I apologize

[VERSE 2: CAMBOI]
Katie Katie Katie
Going off in my head
All day, all night
I just want to be dead
Put an end to all my thoughts
Poisoned with her name
Can't do a damn thing
Without thinking about her face
Tried to vent in 9th grade
When I wrote an essay
About her and my depression
How life will never change
People always say
To put my thoughts of her away
But the only way's to put
A fucking bullet through my brain
And pray it hits the strain
Reserved to memories and names
So if afterlife is real
Then maybe I'll be safe
But hoping and praying is
Simply mentally saying
What you want from your life
Which is more than likely staying
The same, the pain
Rise again and a-gain
Already dead inside
All my emotions are fake
All the smiles and the laughs
Are forced are fabricated
Hopelessly hoping that
I wasn't ever created

[HOOK: ALSACIA]
Love
Is like a bad habit, baby
Love
Makes me feel like such a faggot
Moving on
Isn't something I can do
I've tried and tried
And every time
I fuck up
So I apologize

[VERSE 3: CAMBOI]
For four years
She blatantly ignored me
Fuckin with my head
Like a motherfucking orgy
Even had a couple classes
Where I sat right next to her
Blew me off in person
And every time I texted her
She'd say say who's this?
With utter nonchalance
I'd tell her who it is
No response
The idea had been drilled
Deep in my subconscious
That she and I interacting was
Completely preposterous
But then the day came
She could no longer retain
She gave me another chance
Consolidated we became
We texted all the time
Not a moment was mundane
This shit was unrealistic
Nobody could appertain
Even more when I came
Over to sleep over I told her
I love her moreover the closer
We got to each other
Didn't feel the same
But she seemed to be okay
On the other hand was I
Unknowingly going insane

[HOOK: ALSACIA]
Love
Is like a bad habit, baby
Love
Makes me feel like such a faggot
Moving on
Isn't something I can do
I've tried and tried
And every time
I fuck up
So I apologize

[VERSE 4: CAMBOI]
I remember waking up
In the middle of the night
Head rested on my shoulder
She was sleeping by my side
That was the first time I
Could have probably cried
From elation my cynicism
Had finally been defied
This was more than just love
And infatuation on the line
My entire perspective of
Life was on thin ice
I fell through from the
Heat of the moment and I
Was frozen in the loop
Unfortunate not to die
My life was turning somber
I went to see the doctor
Got the antidepressants and
Zoloft turned me to a monster
Now I squander
I live without purpose
Cause I can't figure out what the
Fuck I did to deserve this
I'm feeling worthless cuz
Entropy makes me up chuck
You think it gets better?
Shut the fuck up
You're a fucking grown up
And there is no such shit
But Katie Travis, I
Love you so much, bitch

[BRIDGE: ALSACIA]
I'm so sorry, Katie
If you're listening to this (Uhh)
Can't believe I let him
Talk me into this shit (Wait, what?)
Didn't know Cameron was
Such a little bitch (That's not the lyrics)
Maybe he should go
And jump off a bridge (Jesus)
I'm serious, there's no hope for you (Dang)
You wanna die, and I hope you do (That's fucked up)
I'm serious, there's no hope for you (Okay)
You wanna die, and I hope you do (You don't have to say it twice)
Cameron, please, don't you even "tlkame" (Alright, I'm killing myself)
I tried to hide
But I confide
I hope you die
But I apologize