Kanye West - The New Workout Plan [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

[Intro]
You just popped in the Kanye West
Get Right for the Summer workout tape
And ladies if you follow these instructions exactly
You might be able to pull you a rapper, a NBA player
Man, at least a dude with a car
So first of all we gonna work on the stomach
Nobody wants a little tight ass

[Verse 1]
1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and get them sit ups right and
Tuck your tummy tight and do your crunches like this
Give head, stop breathe, get up, check your weave
Don't drop the blunt and disrespect the weed
Pick up your son and don't disrespect your seed
It's a party tonight and ooh she's so excited
Tell me who's invited: you, your friends and my dick
What's scary to me is
Henny makes girls look like Halle Berry to me
So excuse me miss, I forgot your name
Thank you, God bless you, good night I came

[Hook]
It's been a week without me
And she feel weak without me
She wanna talk it out but
Ain't nothing to talk about
Unless she's talking about freaking out
Then maybe we can work it out

[Verse 2]
Oh girl your silhouette make me wanna light a cigarette
My name Kanye from the Jigga set
Twista said "Get It Wet"
Ooh girl your breath is harsh!
Cover your mouth up like you got SARS
Off them tracks yea I bought them cars
Still kill a nigga on 16 bars
We ain't sweating to the oldies
We juking to a cold beat
Maybe one day girl we can bone
So you can brag to all your homies now
But I still mess with a big girl
If you ain't fit girl, I'll still hit girl
1 and you brought 2 friends
OK, 3 more now hop in the Benz
4-door - do you know the difference between a 5, 6, 7, 8
All the mocha lattes you gotta do Pilates
You gotta pop this tape in before you start back dating
Hustlers, gangstas, all us ballas

[Interlude]

[Jill]
Hi, my name is Jill, I just want to say thanks to
Kanye's workout plan. I was able to pull a NBA player
And like now I shop every day on Rodeo Drive
I just want to say, thank you Kanye! Woooo! Woooo! Woooo!

[Lasandra]
My name is Lasandra, and I just want to say
That ever since listening to Kanye's workout tape
I was able to get my phone bill paid, I got sounds and 13's
Put up in my Cavalier and I was able to get a free trip to Cancun
And what's most importantly is that I ain't gotta fuck with Ray-Ray's
Broke ass no mo'

[Ella-May]
My name is Ella-May from Mobile, Alabama
And I just want to say since listening to Kanye's workout tape
I been able to date outside the family, I got a double wide
And I rode the plane, rode the plane, rode the plane

[Girls]
Thanks to Kanye's workout plan
I'm the envy of all my friends
See I pulled me a baller man
And I ain't gotta work at the mall again

I wanna see you work out
It's like that old Michael Jackson shit

That's right put in work, move your ass, go berserk
Eat your salad, no dessert
Get that man you deserve
It's Kanye's workout plan